The only fantastic thing about Fantastic Four is how much blandness it manages to pack into 100 minutes. If taking talented actors—Miles Teller, Michael B. Jordan, Kate Mara and Jamie Bell play the central four—and leeching them of all charisma is a superpower, then director Josh Trank has oomph enough to give even Superman a run for his money.
Or maybe Trank isn’t the one solely responsible for this filmic personification of mayonnaise. Rumors have circulated for months that he was pushed off the film following on-set misbehavior, requiring that producers and 20th Century Fox step in and finish the job. At the very least, we know there were reshoots; the awful wig that Mara wears in some scenes can attest to that.
Fantastic Four reads like studio filmmaking taken to its extreme: no creative stamp, no risks taken, any vestiges of personality all but completely stripped from the final product.